We all love sharing a show with our partner, finding something we both enjoy watching, or a restaurant we both crave going back to. Then we have things we do for the other person, watching the game because his team is playing, going to the concert, not because you love them, but she does, yet enjoying it because of her. While these are both good and necessary in a relationship, it is so important to find healthy activities you truly both enjoy. This can be going for a Saturday morning walk, an evening run, discussing life over a weekend coffee, delving into a subject together like philosophy or biology, or maybe discovering a new physical pursuit like dance or yoga. There are endless pursuits that bring us forward in life that we can enjoy alongside our partner.
Doing Something for ‘Us'
It is so refreshing with you do something together, that you both enjoy. Whether that’s going to the beach for an evening walk and talking about anything and everything (which is a treat in itself), but it is so much better by the fact that one of us isn’t dragging the other out. One of us isn’t making a sacrifice. Some couples just naturally click on what seems like everything, and others less so. This is an area where personality tests and discovering love languages can help us in discovering more about the other. A simple path to discovering cross-over interests is to just try new things together.
Connecting in the Day-to-Day
A simple path to discovering cross-over interests is to just try new things together. Start with exploring activities one enjoys that the other hasn’t tried. We quickly discovered a weekend in the woods together is something we both really enjoy, yet, one of us had grown up camping while the other had rarely been. We quickly discovered it as one of our favorite ways to reconnect and recharge.
Another area that we have enjoyed common ground is music. Beyond the everyday jams, we are gently brought together through sharing a morning with some classical or an evening dinner over some mellow jazz. We love to turn up some Elton and Queen on a Friday night over a cocktail and do a little dance, we found it never hurts to go through some different genres and discover similar music you can relax, cook, jam and dance to together!
You’re Not Just Sharing Activities
Going to museums or coffee shops, hosting dinner parties or cookouts, sharing a glass of wine or a theological opinion. Find things you enjoy doing with your partner is like finding an exercise or sport you enjoy. If you discover you like to bike, you’ll never have to make yourself exercise, it is what you look to do. As you find things you enjoy doing with your partner, it will be easy to be on the same page, share similar perspectives, but most of all, enjoy life with you mate. A wonderful aspect of this is knowing that they also are enjoying it with you! And bonus, you will find you naturally build up your mind, body, and spirit through these times and spend less time falling into the veg-out guilty pleasure activities that seem to be ever ready to occupy more evening than we would like to admit!
Finding Balance
Every relationship needs its rest. Having things that are our own, especially in a long term relationship, is necessary and provide healthy time apart. Time to breath, time to realize all the things we miss about the other when they are not around, time to miss them! But these moment of solitude are only as good as the time we spend together.
